“Healing our early experiences of being an outsider in a world that rewards sameness and shuns difference’
What is it?
A team of professional Group Facilitators and certified Coaches take participants on an exhilarating and life changing journey that is intense, revealing, nurturing and profound.
The Quest Program, organized in groups of up to 20 gay men, draws upon the latest evidence based practices including – self-inquiry, discussions in small and large groups, sharing memories, psychological exploration, visualisation, book work, journaling, coaching, self reflection and contributions from practitioners including Brené Brown, Alan Downs and David Richo.
During the process, participants get to grieve the past, release thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving them, and practice new behaviours and beliefs that move them forward to living a life of fulfillment, connection and authentic self expression.
We go to the heart of the matter by posing the question:
“How is our past negatively impacting our present and jeopardising our future?”
- ‘Investigate’ the past, looking at the significant moments and experiences that impacted their childhood, adolescence and early adulthood.
- ‘Explore’ the present by casting a critical and inquisitive eye over their respective lives.
- An opportunity to safely work through ‘remembered’ pain and ‘Release’ the underlying toxicity that can prohibit them from love and connection.
- By initiating valuable insights and life skills each participant begins being the true architect of their lives and ‘Cultivate’ an authentic way of day to day living.
How many days are involved?
Preparation: Participants are asked make lists of reflections in response to a daily question in the week leading up to the weekend.
Friday (7pm – 10pm): Introduction session. Preparing for the journey, setting intentions and establishing safety. Exploring significant life moments.
Saturday (10am – 6pm): Investigating – Early childhood and adolescence experiences, Exploring – Limiting Beliefs & Survival Strategies, Investigating – Shame, Cultivating – Self Compassion + Empathy.
Sunday (10am – 5.30pm): Exploring – Adult experiences, Cultivating – Passion, Love & Integrity, Identifying and Setting – Personal goals and Support mechanisms.
Post Weekend Exercise: A 12-day support and reflection exercise via email.
Follow-up Integration Session (7pm – 10pm): Approximately 3 weeks after the weekend we gather to share our experiences, learning and challenges ahead.
What is the premise of The Quest Program?
1. ODDLY OUT OF PLACE: Openly same-sex relationships are rarely reflected in our family of origin, nor in the families of those around us. Like all children, many of us looked around us for information, examples and guidance to help us make sense of our inner world and feel a sense of belonging, but we often found little or no evidence to match our hungry and inquisitive nature. In our search for meaning many of us had thoughts that included – Something is wrong, I don’t belong, I am alone
2. DEVELOPING LIMITING BELIEFS: Those thoughts led to beliefs that there was something wrong with us. Many of us had internal beliefs that included – I am bad, I am unloveable, I am unworthy, I am not good enough, I am a mistake, I am different
3. SURVIVAL STRATEGIES: In order to carry on with day-to-day living, we had to hide the limiting beliefs, we therefore put in place a variety of survival strategies. Many of us developed strategies that include – The Charmer,The Rebel, The Joker, The Pleaser, The Seducer, The Prince, The Chameleon
4. THE PAST IN OUR PRESENT: This journey from childhood, through adolescence and into adulthood leaves many of us still carrying unhealed emotional scars, wounds and trauma from the past, which show up in our present day experiences. These show up in a variety of ways which include – anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, risky behaviours, low self- esteem, addictions
Who is it for ?
The Quest Program is designed for gay men of all backgrounds and experiences, from personal development first timers to seasoned therapists. Diversity is important to the success of the program and this is reflected in the diverse ages, physical abilities, ethnic backgrounds and income brackets of our participants.
What can I get from participating?
- New, nurturing relationships
- Healed family relationships
- Improved mental and physical health
- Positive practices and habits replacing destructive behaviours
- Positive career changes and promotion
- Increased creativity
- Increased confidence
- Intimate and supportive new friendships
Testimonials from previous participants……
“Great job! You created and maintained a unique and very special environment” – Shaun
“Revealing! Awesome! – Enrique
“Incredibly moving, challenging, intimate, transformative” – Chris
“Amazing insight into the complex issues of growing up as a gay person” – Leslie
“Positive, fun, emotional, affirming. Wholly positive and effective in making me feel ‘unstuck’ – thank you!” – Steve
“Enlightening, challenging, constructive” – Daran
“Powerful, emotional, bloody f**king difficult at times, but most of all – REWARDING. A powerful emotional roller coaster, but well guided all the way” – Chris
“A fantastic opportunity to share in people’s narratives and be part of a healing process. The helpers and facilitators were incredibly kind, warm, generous and present. Thank you. Transformational! Comforting. Moving” – Ali
“Right of passage course every gay man should do. Deep connection of the experience I and other gay men have in the challenges we face living happy, healthy and fulfilled lives” – Ben
“Challenging, scary at times. Way beyond what I was expecting.” – Martin
You can read what other participants have been saying in our ongoing “My Story” series.
Founded in 2011 by certified Coaches and Group Facilitators Ade Adeniji and Darren Brady, The Quest is a (not for profit) United Kingdom registered Social Enterprise offering personal development programs and events for gay men.The lead facilitators for the Dallas Program will be Ade & Darren.
2015 Dates for Dallas
Friday 25 Sept (7pm – 10pm)
Saturday 26 Sept (10am – 6pm)
Sunday 27 Sept (10am – 5.30pm
Thursday 22 Oct (7pm – 10pm)
Participants are required to attend all sessions
Cathedral of Hope, Interfaith Peace Chapel, 5910 Cedar Springs Rd, Dallas, TX 75235
Standard: $1,500.00 (Full Rate/Waged)
Reduced: $1,000.00 (Low-Income/Student/Seniors)
Subsidized Bursary: $500.00 (Limited financial means)
To book your place click here.
Included in the registration fee:
- Pre-Program daily reflective emails from The Quest; 7-days before the weekend
- Participant guidebook for the Program
- Journal for capturing insights during the Program
- Refreshments and lunch during the our time together
- Post weekend 12-day group process and support
- Group follow-up evening – 4 weeks – after the Weekend
- Joining a community of wholehearted fellow gay Questors!
Read More: “Love Me As I am: Gay Men reflect on their lives” the book published by The Quest.
To contact The Quest, email – email@example.com
Reference material for The Quest Program includes:
- The Velvet Rage – Overcoming the pain of growing up gay in a straight man’s world (Alan Downs)
- The Gifts of Imperfection – Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to be and Embrace Who You are (Brené Brown)
- Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead (Brené Brown)
- Gay Warrior: Transforming Betrayal into Wisdom (Jim F. Fickey and Gary S. Grimm)
- Daring to Trust – Opening Ourselves to Real Love and Intimacy (David Richo)
- Coming out of Shame: Transforming Gay and Lesbian Lives (Gershen Kaufman and Lev Raphael)
- Understanding and Healing Emotional Trauma: Conversations with Pioneering Clinicians and Researchers (Daniella F Sieff)