Talk is cheap? Or we cheapen talk?

Posted on September 4, 2012 by The Quest

The discrepancy between our ‘talk’ and our ‘actions’ is a major source of upset and frustration to those around us.

How often do we say we will do something we then fail to do?

Saying one thing and doing another creates uncertainty and mistrust for others.
But what does it create for us, the person creating the disparity in the first place?

For me, the experience leaves me feeling fraudulent. I feel like I’ve let myself down. I carry an additional burden of regret. If I say I will do something knowing I won’t then I also feel the additional weight of deceptiveness. All this is unnecessary psychological ‘noise’

Having consciously cleaned up my act over the last few years ( yes, it has taken years to break the habit of saying yes when I really mean no ) I now have a different experience of life.
In a word, life becomes SIMPLE.

When I say what I will and won’t do and stick to it things work with a smooth simplicity, a quiet peacefulness. The noise and aggravation that I had previously experienced as a consequence of letting others and myself down evaporated.

Of course there are still times when I commit to something that for whatever reason I am unable to do. When that happens I take the first opportunity to communicate the change in arrangements and move on.

To ‘walk the talk’ I have realised that it’s important to:

• Accept and understand what is realistically possible
• Understand what you ‘do’ and ‘don’t want to do
• Communicate clearly and decisively
• Give adequate time and space to the commitment
• Alter plans quickly when circumstances change and communicate clearly
• Know that saying what you want to do will not upset others
• Realise that being clear and decisive makes life easier for everyone around you.

They say that actions speak louder than words. But when our actions match our words we gain the respect and trust of others. We also gain the peace and confidence that comes with living with integrity.

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