The Quest Programme
Although it might sound like the most daunting of our services, The Quest Programme for Gay Men forms the centre piece of our work.
The Quest Programme is a psycho-educational and experiential process that allows participants to create a life they wholeheartedly love.
A team of professional Group Facilitators and certified Coaches take participants on an exhilarating and life changing journey that is intense, revealing, nurturing and profound.
The Quest Programme, organised in groups of up to 15 gay men, draws upon the latest evidence based practices including – self-inquiry, discussions in pairs/triads, small and large groups, sharing memories, psychological exploration, mindfulness, book work, journaling, coaching, self reflection and contributions from practitioners including Brené Brown, Alan Downs and David Richo.
During the process, participants get to grieve the past, release thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving them, and practice new behaviours and beliefs that move them forward to living a life of fulfillment, connection and authentic self expression.
We go to the heart of the matter by posing the question:
Preparation: Participants are asked make lists of reflections in response to a daily question for 6 days leading up to the face-to-face session.
Friday (10am- 6pm): Introduction session. Preparing for the journey, setting intentions and establishing safety. Exploring significant life moments and self-defeating habits. Investigating early childhood experiences. Exploring Shame.
Saturday (10am – 6pm): Investigating -late childhood and adolescence experiences, Exploring – Limiting Beliefs & Survival Strategies, Investigating – ‘Overwhelmed by shame’ and ‘Compensating for shame. Releasing grief.
Sunday (10am – 5.30pm): Exploring – Adult experiences, Cultivating self-compassion and authenticity. Expressing intimacy. Taking a challenge. Forgiveness.
Integration: Participants will take part in a 6-day email check-in, starting the Monday after our weekend together. There will then be three online (via Zoom) sessions, where attendees get to explore a range of topics to help them embed the insights from the weekend. These sessions will take place on the first three Sundays after the weekend.
We guide the group through a series of carefully constructed activities that constructively reveal a different way forward.
During the voyage, The Quest uses a map comprising of four main ‘ports of call’ (or significant milestones) – Investigation, Exploration, Release and Cultivation – each port serving as a platform to help you better understand your past and fully step into your present.
1. ODDLY OUT OF PLACE: Openly same-sex relationships are rarely reflected in our family of origin, nor in the families of those around us. Like all children, many of us looked around us for information, examples and guidance to help us make sense of our inner world and feel a sense of belonging, but we often found little or no evidence to match our hungry and inquisitive nature. In our search for meaning many of us had thoughts that included – Something is wrong, I don’t belong, I am alone
2. DEVELOPING LIMITING BELIEFS: Those thoughts led to beliefs that there was something wrong with us. Many of us had internal beliefs that included – I am bad, I am unloveable, I am unworthy, I am not good enough, I am a mistake, I am different
3. SURVIVAL STRATEGIES: In order to carry on with day-to-day living, we had to hide the limiting beliefs, we therefore put in place a variety of survival strategies. Many of us developed strategies that include – The Charmer,The Rebel, The Joker, The Pleaser, The Seducer, The Prince, The Chameleon, The Shape-shifter
4. THE PAST IN OUR PRESENT: This journey from childhood, through adolescence and into adulthood leaves many of us still carrying unhealed emotional scars, wounds and trauma from the past, which show up in our present day experiences. These show up in a variety of ways which can include – anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, risky behaviours, low self- esteem, addictions and other self-defeating habits
By attending this interactive and engaging prgoramme, participants will:
The Quest Programme is designed for gay men of all backgrounds and experiences, from personal development first timers to seasoned therapists. Diversity is essential to the success of the workshop and this is reflected in the diverse ages, physical abilities, ethnic backgrounds and income brackets of our participants.
Venue: Central YMCA Club, 112 Great Russell Street, London WC1B 3NQ
Still have questions? Do check out our responses to the frequently asked questions about The Quest Programme – FAQ
We also offer The Daring Way™ (based on the research of Brené Brown), for more information visit – www.daringeurope.com.
“Great job! You created and maintained a unique and very special environment” – Shaun
“Revealing! Awesome! – Enrique
“Incredibly moving, challenging, intimate, transformative” – Chris
“Amazing insight into the complex issues of growing up as a gay person” – Leslie
“Positive, fun, emotional, affirming. Wholly positive and effective in making me feel ‘unstuck’ – thank you!” – Steve
“Enlightening, challenging, constructive” – Daran
“Powerful, emotional, bloody f**king difficult at times, but most of all – REWARDING. A powerful emotional roller coaster, but well guided all the way” – Chris
“A fantastic opportunity to share in people’s narratives and be part of a healing process. The helpers and facilitators were incredibly kind, warm, generous and present. Thank you. Transformational! Comforting. Moving” – Ali
“Right of passage course every gay man should do. Deep connection of the experience I and other gay men have in the challenges we face living happy, healthy and fulfilled lives” – Ben
“Challenging, scary at times. Way beyond what I was expecting.” – Martin
You can read what other participants have been saying in our ongoing “My Story” series.