Transformational spaces that explore + cultivate wholehearted living


Gay men and shame is not exactly an easy sell


Gay men and shame is not exactly an easy sell.

How to make it sound fun, entertaining and attractive?

What’s ironic is that isn’t that how gay men are perceived? Fun, entertaining and attractive?

20 gay men on a workshop for 3 days talking about shame is hardly going to be a laugh a minute is it?

So what do I say?

On the one hand I want to convey my passion for fun, laughter and expression and on the other I’m promoting a project that looks at pain, sadness and isolation.

Gay men aren’t much help either having created such a alluring picture of the obligation free life, party, party, party, style, muscles and with superb taste in interior design.

But the surface belies what lurks beneath.

This glossy image does not correspond with the reality.
Research has found that gay men are 4 times more likely to suffer depression, dysfunctional relationships, behaviour, self harming and ,at worse, suicide.

There’s clearly work to be done.

During Quest workshops what emerges is incredible joy out of the pain. There’s laughter and energy coming out of tears and anger. It’s like alchemy- where base metal turns into gold. The caterpillar to the butterfly. Ugliness into beauty.

My final thought to help you understand my mission is this-
When you look beneath the surface of your own life can you also see that it is often the darkness that so often turns to gold?

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