Transformational spaces that explore + cultivate wholehearted living


Frequently Asked Questions

Central to the work we do is The Quest Programme. Here are the most common questions we get asked…..

People who go on a programme like this.

Do I need to have done any previous self development work?
No. What is required is an open mind, a curiosity about your own life, a willingness to listen and a commitment to the weekend process

Is the programme  only for people who have had a traumatic childhood?
No. The programme is designed for a very diverse range of gay men with differing backgrounds. There may be some people attending that have had very intense and distressing childhoods and there may be others who have had a reasonably uneventful childhood. Everyone is welcomed.

How many people are in a group?
The programme  will accept a group of between 10 – 15 gay guys. We never exceed this number.

Will there be people there from different ethnic backgrounds?
Our mission and our intention is to appeal to and cater for the most diverse groupings of Gay men possible. We purposely encourage gay men from all backgrounds to attend.

Are disabled participants catered for?
Our mission and our intention is to appeal to, and cater for, the most diverse groupings of Gay men possible. Wherever possible we endeavour to create the environment required for all participants to be able to join us.

What type of Gay men will be in the group?
Our programmes attract a very diverse cross section of the Gay population, you name it, we have had it. The programme  is deliberately designed to be relevant regardless of your background or experience.

During the programme

Will I be forced to speak in front of everyone?
We ensure that we create an environment that is emotionally safe, supportive and welcoming. Theprogrammes are experiential and activities take place in small groups of 3-5, in the full group, 1-1 and individually. Nobody is forced to do anything, but everyone is actively encouraged to engage.

How do I know that what I say won’t become common knowledge?
During the first day we spend time agreeing the ground rules for the workshop and this always includes confidentiality. This means that when participants are talking about their workshop experience to others, they agree not to disclose information that makes other people identifiable.

Is it a sexualised environment?
The Programme creates a space where gay men emotionally connect with themselves and each other in a non-sexualised environment.

Is it therapy?
The Programme is not therapy – nor is it an alternative to therapy – however, the effect of participation is therapeutic as it covers emotional and psychological wellbeing issues.

Am I expected to disclose my most personal stories?
You are not expected to disclose anything you don’t want to, but you will find that the environment that is created during the workshop makes people feel safe and comfortable to share very intimate experiences. This is very powerful for the storyteller and but also to those who listen with attention and do their own internal review.

What happens if I get upset during the programme?
Everyone deals with being upset in their own unique way, therefore as part of the ground rules participants agree to listen to their own emotional needs. We also always have 2-3 assistants present (gay men who have completed the programme) and they, along with the facilitators do check-in with participants during the breaks.

How will I benefit from attending?
We always ask participants to identify what they hope to takeway from attending, and during the weekend we revisit this subject too. Ultimately the weekend allows participants to become more aware of the experiences, thoughts, emotions and behaviours that shaped who they are and how to break the cycle of self-defeating habits.

Once the weekend is over how will I cope with any vulnerable or sensitive feelings I have explored?
There is a coordinated integration activity that allows participants to go deeper into the issues explored. This is a powerful process and allows participants to give and receive ongoing support to each other.

Is it a cult?
No. Many of the men who have been on the workshop develop new friends with those in their group or previous groups. As such, a community of gay men who are interested in living an integrated and fulfilling life is gradually being formed.

The nuts and bolts.

Why do I have to pay to participate?
The fees cover the cost of delivering the 3 day workshop and the integration activities: venue, light refreshments, materials, administration and a copy of the book ‘Love Me As I Am‘ – the proceeds from the book go to the charity Diversity Role Models. Part of the fees also goes towards promoting the work of The Quest.

Are the facilitators qualified?
The facilitators are professionals and qualified coaches who specialise in personal development work. They are specialists in people development and they are also gay men who have, and continue to do an extensive amount of self-inquiry and personal development work.

Can I just attend part of the weekend?
No. Participants are expected to attend the entire workshop to be able to achieve the objectives set by the workshop. The workshop is designed as a process that takes people on a journey of self-rediscovery and reconnection from beginning to end.

How many times has the workshop been delivered?
The first of these workshops was delivered in June 2011. Currently we deliver The Quest Workshop approximately 4/5 times a year. It is a well established method that has proven to deliver powerful results.

Is it a residential weekend?
No. Participants go home every evening after the programme. The workshop runs 10:00am – 6.00pm on Friday and Saturday, 10:00 to 5.30pm on Sunday (1730).

Are meals included?
No. Participants normally purchase their own lunch from nearby eateries.

Why would I want to do this?
People join us for different reasons: To look into an issue they have been experiencing, to learn how to live a more fulfilling and authentic life, to meet like-minded people away from the traditional gay scene, to explore relationships and situations that are not longer serving them, to develop more confidence. These are just some of the reasons why.

What happens if I need to cancel my place?
Click here for details of the cancellation policy.

Have another question? Then please do email us at –